Thursday, December 3, 2009

More Accurate Job Titles For Celebrities

I was watching TV the other night and there was a commercial for an acne cream with Mandy Moore. Under her name it said Actress/ Singer. I thought to myself that it was inaccurate because she can neither act nor sing. So I thought of other celebrities and came up with more accurate job descriptions. Enjoy.



Mandy Moore
Attractive Woman



Aston Kutcher
Camera Company Spokesperson

George Lopez
Unfunny Mexican
Carlos Mencia
Even Unfunnier Fake Mexican

Hugh Grant
Constantly Befuddled British Man

Matthew McConaughey
One Time Actor/ Anti-Shirt Activist

Robert Pattinson
Fake Vampire

Dane Cook
Real Vampire
('cause he sucks, get it?)

Paris Hilton
Bad Sex Tape Performer


Kim Kardashian
So-So Sex Tape Performer

Sarah Jessica Parker
Horse/Human Hybrid

Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag
Escaped Mental Patients

Tom Cruise
Mentally Handicapped Actor


That's all I cared to do for now.

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